{"id":938,"date":"2016-10-27T15:55:53","date_gmt":"2016-10-27T19:55:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/?page_id=938"},"modified":"2017-01-18T09:13:50","modified_gmt":"2017-01-18T14:13:50","slug":"sad-flag-fire-boom","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/sad-flag-fire-boom\/","title":{"rendered":"Sad! &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 72 days until&#8230;well, it&#8217;s just hard to believe.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 David Erik Nelson (@SquiDaveo) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/796313839331667969\">November 9, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p><small>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/705407151896973313\">original thread on Twitter<\/a>)<\/small><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<table cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/796313839331667969\">11\/9\/16, 6:29 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 72 days until&#8230;well, it&#8217;s just hard to believe.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/795980359204749313\">11\/8\/16, 8:24 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 73 days until Our Darkest Urge is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/795647717263413248\">11\/7\/16, 10:22 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 74 days until a no-hands climax triggered by a 37min rendition of &#8220;The Aristocrats&#8221; is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/794582694227099649\">11\/4\/16, 12:50 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 77 days until a bird nest composed of tampon strings &amp; the missing 18mins of Watergate tape is inaugurated.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/794193128596963328\">11\/3\/16, 11:02 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 78 days until a low-low-low down payment on a stained sofa with dodgy provenance is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/793902832458031104\">11\/2\/16, 3:49 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 79 days until a severed pig&#8217;s head wearing a jaunty cap is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/793502839175835648\">11\/1\/16, 1:19 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 80 days until a complete shit show, inexplicably renewed for two more seasons, is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/793192921675595776\">10\/31\/16, 4:48 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 81 days until an eagerly devoured chocolate-covered razor blade is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/792019884469211136\">10\/28\/16, 11:07 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 84 days until a sad, sexist slur surreptitiously slurred into a small sour-patch Slurpee is inaugurated PotUS &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/791731620751564800\">10\/27\/16, 4:01 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 85 days until a desperately under-qualified blobfish is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/791285468864339968\">10\/26\/16, 10:28 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 86 days until an 8&#215;10 color glossy picture of non-consensual Goatse reenactment is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/790979047429959680\">10\/25\/16, 2:11 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 87 days until a a four-finger ring emblazoned with a faux-diamond &#8220;SAD!&#8221; is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/790661010772271104\">10\/24\/16, 5:07 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 88 days until a smug turd wearing an &#8220;88&#8221; t-shirt &amp; blowing a deafeningly loud dog-whistle is inaugurated PotUS&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/789515568617402370\">10\/21\/16, 1:15 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 91 days until a long-expired condom purchased in a fit of optimism is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/789118004554440705\">10\/20\/16, 10:56 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 92 days until this very embarrassed tallit is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/789118004554440705\/photo\/1\"><span class=\"s6\">pic.twitter.com\/Mgcn6XcxPV<\/span><\/a>xPV<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/788843143361884161\">10\/19\/16, 4:43 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 93 days until a misleading presentation of the Schmidt Sting Pain Index is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/788468500608102400\">10\/18\/16, 3:55 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 94 days until an idiot&#8217;s ideological whinge about ideologues blinded by idiotic ideology is inaugurated PotUS.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/788109953215107072\">10\/17\/16, 4:10 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 95 days until the mis-rigged rigging of an outrigger canoe is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/786992813896503296\">10\/14\/16, 2:11 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 98 days until a ball of razor blades in a shadowy toy bin is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/786601910891532288\">10\/13\/16, 12:18 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 99 days until an &#8220;unregulated&#8221; industry protected by brutal damage caps is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/786351786487459840\">10\/12\/16, 7:44 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 100 days until this truck is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/786351786487459840\/photo\/1\"><span class=\"s6\">pic.twitter.com\/HPYbYmfAhg<\/span><\/a>Ahg<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/785847848722194434\">10\/11\/16, 10:21 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 101 days until a tedious date with Art Garfunkel is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/785591495021633537\">10\/10\/16, 5:23 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 102 days until a pair of baby shoes (stamping on a human face\u2014forever) is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/784430704985673729\">10\/7\/16, 12:30 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 105 days until a three-ring binder clamped to an unwilling tongue is inaugurated President of the United States&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/784107982929989632\">10\/6\/16, 3:08 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 106 days until the phrase &#8220;fast-acting stool softener&#8221; is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/783714266306142208\">10\/5\/16, 1:03 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 107 days until &#x1f4a9; is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/783354472898633728\">10\/4\/16, 1:13 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 108 days until a goldfish funeral pyre is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/783060962899218433\">10\/3\/16, 5:47 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 109 days until a $916 million IOU, carelessly lost at the dry-cleaner, is inaugurated President of the US.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/781940261299425280\">9\/30\/16, 3:34 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 112 days until a non-existent sex tape (now available on VHS and Blu-ray\u2122!) is inaugurated President of the US.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/781598629853327360\">9\/29\/16, 4:56 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 113 days until a badly botched Turing Test is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/781148339685371906\">9\/28\/16, 11:07 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 114 days until a sad Emoji of a weeping boar eating a BLT is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/780874560899907584\">9\/27\/16, 4:59 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 115 days until a schlubby mantrum is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/780490960954286081\">9\/26\/16, 3:35 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 116 days until wha\u2014? ewch. Guuuuh! Ugh! *Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahhh!!!* &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/779362725017321472\">9\/23\/16, 12:52 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 119 days until a half-Dixie\u2122 cup of expired semen substitute is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/778986096042606592\">9\/22\/16, 11:55 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 120 days until a perpetual payless payday is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/778725538231832577\">9\/21\/16, 6:40 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 121 days until a portable crib with guillotine &#8220;features&#8221; is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/778296212147634176\">9\/20\/16, 2:14 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 122 days until 10 pounds of sweaty dynamite in a five-pound bag is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/777885931516882944\">9\/19\/16, 11:03 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 123 days until a narcissistic grue with self-esteem issues is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/776822161650618369\">9\/16\/16, 12:36 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 126 days until the sum of our fears is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/776546358404739072\">9\/15\/16, 6:20 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 127 days until an actual, literal worst-case scenario is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/776086017359110149\">9\/14\/16, 11:51 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 128 days until a dubious SEC filing scrawled on moist cotton balls is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/775751172644888577\">9\/13\/16, 1:41 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 129 days until an impassioned libertarian plea for draconian intellectual property protections is inaugurated.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/775353629020606464\">9\/12\/16, 11:21 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 130 days until this guy is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/775353629020606464\/photo\/1\"><span class=\"s6\">pic.twitter.com\/cshYxQanZ0<\/span><\/a>nZ0<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/774274746968145920\">9\/9\/16, 11:54 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 133 days until a ruthlessly roofied roofer atop a startlingly slanted scaffold is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/773984122230280192\">9\/8\/16, 4:39 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 134 days until a slightly damp counterfeit packet of Rock-a-Dile Red Kool-Aid powder is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/773629718314700800\">9\/7\/16, 5:11 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 135 days until a candy-corn enema is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/773284608137764868\">9\/6\/16, 6:19 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 136 days until a vomit-slurping urinal cake is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/772802144307064833\">9\/5\/16, 10:22 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 137 days until the butter-soft hands of a self-proclaimed &#8220;champion of the working class&#8221; are inaugurated. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/772607132076093441\">9\/4\/16, 9:27 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">*record scratch* *freeze frame* Yup, that\u2019s me; you\u2019re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation\u2026 &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/772607132076093441\/photo\/1\"><span class=\"s6\">pic.twitter.com\/EHgbagzysk<\/span><\/a>ysk<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/771691584714903553\">9\/2\/16, 8:49 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 140 days until an all-White HAMILTON touring company is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/771348460369014784\">9\/1\/16, 10:06 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 141 days until the Nuremberg Rally of the Stars is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/771034566488317952\">8\/31\/16, 1:19 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s7\">&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/771034566488317952\/photo\/1\"><span class=\"s8\">pic.twitter.com\/80Zf0GbCWr<\/span><\/a>CWr<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/771004335782187008\">8\/31\/16, 11:18 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 142 days until an ill-timed Pokemon GO reference is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/770646033571479554\">8\/30\/16, 11:35 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 143 days until a precocious case of vengeful chlamydia is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/770324784584404993\">8\/29\/16, 2:18 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 144 days until a dick stuck in our nation&#8217;s collective mashed potatoes is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/769264388951932928\">8\/26\/16, 4:04 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 147 days until a flood-relief care-package of misprinted &#8220;WHITE LIVES MATTER&#8221; t-shirts is inaugurated President&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/768816471329771521\">8\/25\/16, 10:25 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 148 days until a spittle-flecked, full-throttle burkini freakout is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/768489543389458432\">8\/24\/16, 12:45 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 149 days until a bounced tax refund check is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/768092687920664576\">8\/23\/16, 10:29 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 150 days until the meddling billionaire come to save us from the meddling of billionaires is inaugurated PotUS.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/767750404524376064\">8\/22\/16, 11:48 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 151 days until a sticky badger lounging in a condemned dumpster is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/766668341838696452\">8\/19\/16, 12:09 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 154 days until a mediocre genital ventriloquist is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/766300002234798080\">8\/18\/16, 11:45 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 155 days until a collection notice for an unpaid police-beating co-pay is inaugurated President U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/765937689573163009\">8\/17\/16, 11:45 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 156 days until a comical typo in a prominent neck tattoo is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/765570694826582017\">8\/16\/16, 11:27 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 157 days until a high-risk, low-yield tranche of weaponized debt &amp; investment-grade racial slurs is inaugurated&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/765204446708133888\">8\/15\/16, 11:12 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 158 days until a heavily redacted pocket U.S. Constitution annotated in Cyrillic is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/764130812589510656\">8\/12\/16, 12:05 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 161 days until a tiny wang scrawled on a large sheet of premium calfskin vellum is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/763756087745142784\">8\/11\/16, 11:16 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 162 days until a sorta-kinda convincing human costume full of earwigs &amp; Crystal Pepsi is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/763458882010095616\">8\/10\/16, 3:35 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 163 days until a fistulant payday lender with malice aforethought is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/763031209865719808\">8\/9\/16, 11:16 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 164 days until a micropenis with a poor grasp of macroeconomics is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/762762497787133953\">8\/8\/16, 5:28 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 165 days until a suppurating rage-hog is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/761577707629142016\">8\/5\/16, 11:00 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 168 days until your mom&#8217;s secret stash of hangover regrets is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/761270335446585346\">8\/4\/16, 2:39 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 169 days until an uncompensated prison guard on a cough-syrup binge is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/760888653832974337\">8\/3\/16, 1:22 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 170 days until a Magnum\u2122 condom bought solely to impress nosey housekeepers is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/760600721049911296\">8\/2\/16, 6:18 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 171 days until a lightly rinsed perpetual pill is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/760149692646699008\">8\/1\/16, 12:26 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 172 days until a large pile of money suspiciously left beneath a dangling anvil is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/759074105438134272\">7\/29\/16, 1:12 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 175 days until an unattributed quote from a vilified source is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/758691824890421248\">7\/28\/16, 11:53 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 176 days until a birthday wish for global armed conflict is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/758383494942732288\">7\/27\/16, 3:28 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 177 days until a priceless vase on a tippy pedestal is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/758049388673560576\">7\/26\/16, 5:20 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 178 days until a principled stand to ignore concrete suffering is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/757624357535506436\">7\/25\/16, 1:11 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 179 days until an unread copy of the PROTOCOLS OF THE ELDERS OF ZION is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/756505016504987648\">7\/22\/16, 11:03 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 182 days until a structurally unsound promise of an entirely untenable future is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/756258246655115264\">7\/21\/16, 6:43 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 183 days until the least viable kayfabe in pro-wrestling history is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/755881978029834241\">7\/20\/16, 5:48 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 184 days until an inaugural address entirely copied from Wikipedia is inaugurated President of the US.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/755515909058469888\">7\/19\/16, 5:33 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 185 days until a middle-school &#8220;Plagiarism&#8221; essay entirely copied from Wikipedia is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/755116783166775296\">7\/18\/16, 3:07 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 186 days until a gelatinous cube is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/753976330031476736\">7\/15\/16, 11:35 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 189 days until a benzene martini (two olives and a twist) is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/753590839243223040\">7\/14\/16, 10:03 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 190 days until an &#8220;ALL LIVE MATTER!!!&#8221; t-shirt (available in men&#8217;s XL only) is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/753274076546863104\">7\/13\/16, 1:05 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 191 days until a pair of bespoke necropants, two sizes too small, is inaugurated President of the US&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/752893335715454976\">7\/12\/16, 11:52 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 192 days until a tortuous, tortious duck vagina is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/752537619624497152\">7\/11\/16, 12:18 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 193 days until a relentlessly self-aggrandizing hog bung is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/751496523024887808\">7\/8\/16, 3:21 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 196 days until a six-digit student loan on an honorary MBA is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/751082855095230464\">7\/7\/16, 11:58 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 197 days until a lovingly crocheted stars-n-bars yarmulka is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/750715021009702912\">7\/6\/16, 11:36 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 198 days until a brain-flecked pillbox hat is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/750450656096489472\">7\/5\/16, 6:05 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 199 days until a Ken\u2122 doll slowly sinking into a bucket of paint stripper is inaugurated President of the US.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/749968424416206848\">7\/4\/16, 10:09 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 200 days until a mouthful of snap-bangs is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/748897485045768193\">7\/1\/16, 11:14 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 203 days until a skin tag with delusions of grandeur is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/748620115793563648\">6\/30\/16, 4:51 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 204 days until a speculum abandoned in a truck stop urinal is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/748202058117976064\">6\/29\/16, 1:10 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 205 days until a slightly irregular Hitler bobblehead is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/747809699475628033\">6\/28\/16, 11:11 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 206 days until a race-riot fundraiser door-prize is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/747443815733149696\">6\/27\/16, 10:57 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 207 days until a sexually adventurous earwig is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/746364947752321024\">6\/24\/16, 11:30 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 210 days until a stack of worthless $100 bills steadying a wobbly diner table is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/746004191689183232\">6\/23\/16, 11:37 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 211 days until a clown-car pile-up is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/745631049489604609\">6\/22\/16, 10:54 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 212 days until an untainted tankard of deveined taints is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/745301125679714304\">6\/21\/16, 1:03 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 213 days until a child&#8217;s pinky toe in a roller rink lost-n-found is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/744921149717417984\">6\/20\/16, 11:53 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 214 days until a dreamcatcher woven from used dental floss &amp; food-grade cartilage nibs is inaugurated President&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/743828060080865280\">6\/17\/16, 11:30 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 217 days until a rectal polyp with many vendettas, zero regrets, is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/743482042315333632\">6\/16\/16, 12:35 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 218 days until a shark jumping a shark tank full of shark-jumping sharks is inaugurated President of the US.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/743094640631517184\">6\/15\/16, 10:55 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 219 days until a $4,000 haircut on a $2 head is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/742757096014352384\">6\/14\/16, 12:34 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 220 days until a mass-extinction event with a flair for hairspray is inaugurated President of the United States&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/742372129413292033\">6\/13\/16, 11:04 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 221 days until an unserialized AR15 emblazoned with a &#8220;COEXIST&#8221; bumper sticker is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/741298599066226688\">6\/10\/16, 11:58 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 224 days until a mountain leech with attachment issues is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/740929379358773248\">6\/9\/16, 11:31 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 225 days until a distressingly moist flesh-tone Croc\u2122 foam clog is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/740636399221645312\">6\/8\/16, 4:07 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 226 days until &#8220;Sexbaby Silicone Realistic Mouth with Tongue and Teeth&#8221; is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/740199736523788288\">6\/7\/16, 11:12 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 227 days until a lone flag-waving crab louse is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/739935943340269568\">6\/6\/16, 5:44 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 228 days until two bald men fighting over a comb are inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/738792865388580865\">6\/3\/16, 2:01 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 231 days until the least popular rat in the most expensive suit is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/738374905209716737\">6\/2\/16, 10:21 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 232 days until a $700 smartphone posting a hysterical one-star review of 99-cent app is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/738018748238565376\">6\/1\/16, 10:45 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 233 days until a teratoma with gold filings and a 2-year degree from a for-profit &#8220;university&#8221; is inaugurated.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/737660035275182080\">5\/31\/16, 11:00 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 234 days until a canary picking a fight with a mirror is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/736202823864569856\">5\/27\/16, 10:30 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 238 days until a skyscraper full of dyspeptic wasps is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/735841729543319552\">5\/26\/16, 10:35 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 239 days until a razor-studded Wiffle Bat\u2122 is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/735494862599008256\">5\/25\/16, 11:36 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 240 days until an orphaned refugee&#8217;s counterfeit lifejacket is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/735127062562930688\">5\/24\/16, 11:15 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 241 days until a well-chewed tube sock dangling from a dog&#8217;s &#8220;exit poll&#8221; is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/734767552807768064\">5\/23\/16, 11:26 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 242 days until a recalled men&#8217;s novelty thong is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/733673675006869504\">5\/20\/16, 11:00 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 245 days until a pair of baby shoes (never worn) is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/733347291197755393\">5\/19\/16, 1:23 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 246 days until a rusty door hinge taking the LSAT for the third time is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/732944727134330880\">5\/18\/16, 10:43 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 247 days until a teddy bear soaked in kerosene is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/732592419615744001\">5\/17\/16, 11:23 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 248 days until a web-aware bidet with a 212\u00ba pressure stream and zero security is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/732229034533392384\">5\/16\/16, 11:19 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 249 days until a syphilitic bear with a coat hanger is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/731140366959792128\">5\/13\/16, 11:13 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 252 days until a payday loan lobbyist polishing an actual turd to a high-gloss finish is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/730776023265120256\">5\/12\/16, 11:05 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 253 days until a water-logged woodland porn stash is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/730412970413572096\">5\/11\/16, 11:03 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 254 days until the sadness that engulfs us all is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/730042741514747904\">5\/10\/16, 10:32 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 255 days until an expired artificial-butterscotch flavored condom is inaugurated President of the United States&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/729675066749784064\">5\/9\/16, 10:11 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 256 days until a military-issue superglue suppository is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/728609650178985984\">5\/6\/16, 11:37 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 259 days until a taco bowl pitched down a Chernobyl elevator shaft is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/728227357111275520\">5\/5\/16, 10:18 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 260 days until a confident C-student mis-explaining the Dunning-Kruger Effect is inaugurated President. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/727860765538062338\">5\/4\/16, 10:01 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 261 days until a yacht crafted from the unshorn fingernails of the dead is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/727851710601797633\">5\/4\/16, 9:25 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 261 until Inauguration Day 2017 &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;<span class=\"s6\">\u00a0[<a href=\"http:\/\/titaniumphysicists.brachiolopemedia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/10\/2535712-one_nation_under_cthulhu_9704.jpeg\">img link<\/a>]<\/span>\u00a0(Is that &#8220;Comeback&#8221; Cruz in the lower right corner\u203d)<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/727511232123691008\">5\/3\/16, 10:52 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 262 days until a 90kg Super Snack Pack\u2122 of weaponized cupidity is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/727155644336316416\">5\/2\/16, 11:19 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 263 days until a toddler-sized flak jacket is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/toosoon\"><span class=\"s9\">#toosoon<\/span><\/a>oon?<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/726054250309115904\">4\/29\/16, 10:23 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 266 days until a loyalty oath hastily scrawled on a BARELY LEGAL subscription card is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/725698606141952000\">4\/28\/16, 10:50 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 267 days until a dank weasel cornholing 5 grams of bath salts is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/725347852566810624\">4\/27\/16, 11:36 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 268 days until a deeply discounted pair of Harbor Freight testicle pliers is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/724966141983088641\">4\/26\/16, 10:19 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 269 days until a Sanrio-licensed Hello Kitty suicide vest is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/724729454262628353\">4\/25\/16, 6:39 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 270 days until a mouthful of broken glass is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/723168532947595264\">4\/21\/16, 11:16 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 274 days until a sack of dicks\u2014actual severed dicks, one sackful\u2014is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/722789305152724993\">4\/20\/16, 10:09 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 275 days until a loaded high-capacity clip in a church collection plate is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/722475199493468160\">4\/19\/16, 1:21 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 276 days until a rectal wart squinting at a blurry teleprompter is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/722068461988524032\">4\/18\/16, 10:25 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 277 days until a sticky Halloween mask labelled &#8220;EXHIBIT L&#8221; is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/720987310528008194\">4\/15\/16, 10:49 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 280 days until an enterprise-level genital chancre is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/720616069128445952\">4\/14\/16, 10:13 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 281 days until a substitute schoolbus driver extracted from a clogged sewer main is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/720270707469357059\">4\/13\/16, 11:21 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 282 days until a medically induced urethral prolapse is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/719918549683347456\">4\/12\/16, 12:02 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 283 days until every sentence beginning &#8220;Not to sound racist, but&#8230;&#8221; is inaugurated President of the U.S. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/719533743229255680\">4\/11\/16, 10:33 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 284 days until a napalm-soaked tampon is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/718443663462948864\">4\/8\/16, 10:21 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 287 days until a water-stained copy of OBTUSE SEXUAL DEVIANCE FOR DUMMIES is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/718075844636225537\">4\/7\/16, 9:59 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 288 days until an entrepreneur hoarding deck chairs on the Titanic is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/717726922793492480\">4\/6\/16, 10:53 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 289 days until a blood-drenched baby shoe embedded on a truck grill is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/717354017345638400\">4\/5\/16, 10:11 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 290 days until a mellon left in the trunk of a Georgia Rent-a-Car is inaugurated President of the United States&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/716981653105741824\">4\/4\/16, 9:32 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 291 days until the neverending mantrum is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/715861665301073920\">4\/1\/16, 7:21 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 294 days until a boot stamping on a human face, forever, is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/715555351848960001\">3\/31\/16, 11:04 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 295 days until a high-tension garage door spring with serious structural flaws is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/715218419415703552\">3\/30\/16, 12:45 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 296 days until a plastic fire in a church parking lot is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/714887179508588544\">3\/29\/16, 2:49 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 297 days until a loving tribute to caustic enemas is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/714475053363105794\">3\/28\/16, 11:31 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 298 days until a high-deductible coat-hanger abortion is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/713370126561574912\">3\/25\/16, 10:21 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 301 days until a partial transcript of a Kanye West drunk-dial is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/713023915673706496\">3\/24\/16, 11:25 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 302 days until a dumpster full of untested rape kits is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/712641839816425472\">3\/23\/16, 10:07 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 303 days until like \u00dcber\u2014but for non-consensual medical experiments!\u2014is inaugurated President of the U.S. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/712346048598036481\">3\/22\/16, 2:31 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 304 days until a moist toilette stuck to a diaper-pail lid is inaugurated President of the United States. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/711932638047637504\">3\/21\/16, 11:09 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 305 days until a slow-simmering case of genital impetigo is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/710829333791809536\">3\/18\/16, 10:04 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 308 days until a class-2 tire fire is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/710442368340725760\">3\/17\/16, 8:27 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 309 days until a UL-listed rectal switchblade is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/710111390674128896\">3\/16\/16, 10:32 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 310 days until a family-friendly reenactment of Kristallnacht is inaugurated President of the United States.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/709756889706311680\">3\/15\/16, 11:03 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 311 days until a rancid tub of cottage cheese and vipers is inaugurated President of the United States. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8; &#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/709410641572929536\">3\/14\/16, 12:07 PM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 312 days until an impeccably crafted Bangladeshi-made &#8220;WHITE POWER&#8221; t-shirt is inaugurated President of the US&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/708314064653524993\">3\/11\/16, 10:30 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 315 days until three kids in a trenchcoat sewn from the hides of three weaker kids is inaugurated President. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8; &#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/707946660039671808\">3\/10\/16, 10:10 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 316 days until a crippled squirrel lodged in the engine of an overbooked 747 is inaugurated President. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8; &#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/707582987957743616\">3\/9\/16, 10:05 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it\u2019s just 317 days until a strip of steel-belted radial slowly roasting on an untended BBQ is inaugurated President.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/707229349393657856\">3\/8\/16, 10:39 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 318 days until a mouse stuck in a Dr\u0101no bottle is inaugurated President of the United States. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8; &#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/706859904452173824\">3\/7\/16, 10:11 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 319 days until a damp obstetrics table in an expired u-store-it unit is inaugurated President of the U.S.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/705772014632624128\">3\/4\/16, 10:08 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 322 days until a life-size butter sculpture of poor impulse control is inaugurated President of the U.S. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"td1\" valign=\"middle\">\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\"><b>David Erik Nelson <\/b>(<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\"><span class=\"s3\">@SquiDaveo<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SquiDaveo\/status\/705407151896973313\">3\/3\/16, 9:59 AM<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\">Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 323 days until an ice cream cone dropped into an open cadaver is inaugurated President of the United States. &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p class=\"p1\"><b> Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 324 days until a loaded gun left on the floor of an unlicensed daycare is inaugurated President of the U.S. <\/b><span class=\"s1\">&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;&#x1f52b;<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 325 days until a late-1970s Cult Mass Suicide Event is inaugurated President of the United States. <\/b><span class=\"s1\">&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>(no 326)<\/b><\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Hard to believe there&#8217;s just 327 days until the Grand Toupee of the<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>KKK is sworn in as President if the United States.<\/b><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 72 days until&#8230;well, it&#8217;s just hard to believe.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525; \u2014 David Erik Nelson (@SquiDaveo) November 9, 2016 (original thread on Twitter) &nbsp; David Erik Nelson (@SquiDaveo) 11\/9\/16, 6:29 AM Hard to believe it&#8217;s just 72 days until&#8230;well, it&#8217;s just hard to believe.&#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525; David Erik Nelson (@SquiDaveo) 11\/8\/16, 8:24 AM Hard to &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/sad-flag-fire-boom\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Sad! &#x1f1fa;&#x1f1f8;&#x1f525;&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/938"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=938"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/938\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1119,"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/938\/revisions\/1119"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davideriknelson.com\/sbsb\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=938"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}