Presented without further commentary: “Funkytown” vs. “Closer to Funkytown”
Happy Non-Denominational Gift Giving Holiday Season!
I’m a mixed Jew who’s lived in the American Midwest for his entire life. I think these songs, more than anything else I’ve ever written, are honest about that experience.
(Incidentally, given that this year is one of the few when Xmas and Xanukah overlap, all of these songs are especially appropriate.)
- Another Dark Xmastime (FUN FACT: I wrote this during my first year as a fundamentally unemployable stay-at-home dad; my children believe it is an accepted part of the general Xmas Music Canon.)
- Dreidel Bells (FUN FACT: The beat here is an original GameBoy running an early German Nanoloop cartridge. Both voices are obviously me, but the filters for the robot voice badly overburdened my old iBook, causing significant lag–which is why Mr. Roboto struggles so badly to hit his marks.)
- DreidelDreidelDreidel (FUN FACT: The beat here is a vintage analog Boss DR-55 once owned by POE, crammed through a heavy-metal distortion stompbox.)
Our Most Important Thanksgiving Traditions 🦃💀
I’m a child of the 1980s, so most of my nostalgic holiday memories are TV-related. 🤷♀️
1. “As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!”
THANKSGIVING TURKEY GIVEAWAY! (WKRP in Cincinnati) from Tony DeSanto on Vimeo.
(Yeah, I repost this every year, because I love this gag, and because watching this on TV—and rehashing it with my mom and sisters each year—is one of my fondest holiday memories. But it is, in my humble, a damn-near perfect gag. That’s saying something, because I find single-camera laugh-track situation comedies almost entirely unbearable to watch. If you wanna read more of my thoughts on this specific gag and what it can teach writers, you can do so here.)
2. “…your people will wear cardigans and drink highballs; we will sell our bracelets by the road sides…”
3. ♬♫♪ “Caught his eye on turkey day / As we both ate Pumpkin Pie … ” ♬♫♪
4. “What do Jews do on Thanksgiving?”
(I wrote this essay a few years back; every word is both true and factual—which is a harder trick than you’d think.)
You’ll be 15 minutes into that Lesser Family Feast in Michigan when your mother-in-law will turn to you and ask:
“What do Jews do on Thanksgiving?”
You should be prepared for this sort of thing in Michigan. But even though I’m warning you in advance, you still won’t be prepared.…(excerpt from IN MICHIGAN: A PRIMER, A TRAVELOGUE)
I hope your day is good and sweet. Gobblegobble! 🦃💀
Just a wholesome song in celebration of the noble flamingo 🌈 ♬♫♪
Loretta Lynn has passed, but “Fist City” leaves on eternally ♬♫♪
Loretta Lynn, a singer and songwriter whose rise from dire poverty in Kentucky coal country to the pinnacle of country music was chronicled in the best-selling memoir and movie “Coal Miner’s Daughter,” and whose candid songs gave voice to the daily struggles of working-class women, died Oct. 4 at her home in Hurricane Mills, Tenn. She was 90.…
[Lynn] was a teenage bride and mother, a country star and a grandmother by her early 30s.obituary in the Washington Post
This is, in lyrics and delivery and bear-trap smile, 100% the song of a 30-year-old grammy who is done taking shit. May she watch over all of us, and forever be our guide.
Lizzo and the Crystal Flute
I just sorta love everything about this. Such delight!
“How Lizzo came to play a president’s crystal flute on a D.C. stage”
How the hell have I never heard of the Sadistic Mika Band? ♬♫♪
More importantly: How the hell have you never heard of the Sadistic Mike Band‽
WE’VE WASTED OUR LIVES RIGHT UP UNTIL THIS EXACT MOMENT!!!
(also, this TV host is sort of amazing, right? like, in that it’s hard to believe he isn’t a character Bill Hader made up for SNL)
Is this song about a serial killer or a sex criminal? ♬♫♪
I just 100% don’t know how to cope with the existence of the song “Butcher Pete.”
And, yeah, this may be one of those murderous earworms that literally consumes you from the inside out. Sorry! My bad for sharing!
Straight Talk: Every Rap Crew Should Have an ASL Interpreter. I LOVE THIS!!!
Yes, I saw CODA. Yes, I hella dug. No, I WASN’T CRYING THAT MOVIE THEATER JUST WAS MAD SETTING OFF MY ALLERGIES GOTO HELL IM FINE!!1!
“Dave, I’m concerned that Greg Gillis (of Girl Talk) may not be an absolute genius; can you help me?” ♬♫♪
Yes. Yes I can: